Sand Between Shifts

Tag: healthcare

  • When the Unexpected Happens: Learning to Stay Steady

    There’s this moment, maybe you’ve felt it too, when something at work veers off the usual path. A monitor flashes a reading you’ve never seen before. A process suddenly fails. A piece of equipment you’ve relied on a hundred times decides today is the day it won’t work. And you’re the one standing there, expected to know what to do.

    In those moments, my mind races. My stomach tightens. I can feel the heat rise in my face. I’ve always had this tendency to get anxious when something unfamiliar pops up, especially at work. It’s like my nervous system doesn’t pause to ask, “Is this truly an emergency?” before launching into full-blown alarm mode.

    In healthcare, sometimes it is a matter of life and death. Our environments are fast-paced and high-stakes, and a certain level of vigilance becomes second nature. But not everything is a crisis. Some things are just unexpected. Unfamiliar. Inconvenient. Solvable.

    And still, I’ve noticed how quickly I jump to worst-case thinking, how I internalize the problem, replay every moment, and get stuck in my head even after the issue is resolved. The self-awareness is there, for better or worse. I recognize my overreactions almost as soon as they happen, which can be both a gift and a frustration. I see the spiral as it’s happening, and I wish I could stop it in its tracks.

    Lately, I’ve been reflecting on what it would look like to have a more grounded, measured response when things don’t go as planned. To slow down before reacting. To trust that I’m capable, even when the problem is new. To remind myself that I don’t have to know everything to find a solution and that most challenges can be worked through with time, teamwork, and a deep breath.

    Perspective is powerful. I just wish I could access it in the moment, not just in hindsight. Because when I zoom out, once the moment has passed, I can see how inflated my reaction was. How the thing that felt catastrophic was really just… a hiccup. A lesson. An opportunity to practice resourcefulness.

    So here’s what I’m working on: giving myself more grace when the unexpected happens. Building a mental pause button. Letting the first wave of emotion pass before deciding how to act. And asking myself: is this truly urgent, or just unfamiliar?

    Not every problem needs panic. Some just need patience.

    If you’re wired like me, if you feel things deeply and react quickly, I see you. It’s hard to change the wiring. But even the smallest shifts in awareness can soften the response. And maybe, over time, those small shifts become our new baseline.

    We’re all learning. We’re all adapting. And with each unexpected moment, we get the chance to try again.

  • Blackberry Moments

    Welcome to a new kind of conversation. One that walks beside you instead of rushing ahead. This space, much like a quiet path on a slow afternoon, is where we notice the smaller things. The meaningful things. The ones we usually overlook while racing from one task to the next.

    I’ve been meaning to begin this journey for a while. The idea sat with me for months, maybe years. I told myself I would start when I felt more ready, more polished, more certain. But the truth is, waiting for perfect conditions often means waiting forever. So here I am, showing up anyway. No fancy setup, no script written in stone, just an open heart and a desire to connect. If you’re here, thank you for walking this path with me.

    Recently, I read Unscripted by Ernie Johnson Jr., the longtime host of Inside the NBA. If you’ve ever seen the show, you know him as the guy alongside Shaq, Charles Barkley, and Kenny Smith. But his book is not about sports commentary. It’s about life. Honest, messy, soulful life. It made me laugh, cry, and pause in the best way possible.

    One of the stories he shares has stayed with me, and I think it will stay with you too. Early in the book, he introduces the idea of what he calls blackberry moments. He defines them simply as moments so sweet that you savor the taste for a lifetime.

    The name comes from a story about a little league baseball game he played as a kid. During the game, someone hit a ball way out into the outfield, far enough to disappear over the fence. While everyone paused to wait for the ball to be retrieved, the outfielders didn’t come back right away. When the coaches went to look for them, they found the boys standing in a patch of wild blackberry bushes just beyond the fence, happily picking and eating the berries.

    They forgot about the game for a moment. They were caught up in the sweetness of what was right in front of them. That image struck me. Because isn’t that how life often works? We’re focused on the rules and the routines, doing what we’re supposed to do, and then something unexpected and beautiful catches our attention. It’s often small and fleeting, but somehow it stays with us.

    Ernie weaves blackberry moments throughout the book. They are not grand or showy. They’re quiet, real, and deeply human. And they got me thinking about my own.

    One that always comes to mind is a memory from my childhood. It happened more than once, but each time felt just as vivid. When I was around seven or eight, our family had a little routine. Once a week, my mom, my brother, my Mommom, and I would pile into the car and drive to Santori’s, our local deli and produce market. It wasn’t a far drive, but Mommom always used those few minutes to start rattling off our list. Turkey. Ham. American cheese. All the staples.

    Once we got there, we’d split up. My mom and brother would head to the produce section, while Mommom and I made a beeline for the deli counter. That’s where the real magic happened. I’d grab one of those little paper number tickets and clutch it like it was a winning lottery ticket. My whole focus became listening for our number. I took that job seriously. When they finally called it, I would walk up with purpose and recite our order with total confidence. Half a pound of turkey. Half a pound of ham. A pound of American cheese.

    Almost every time, the deli clerk would smile and hand me a slice of cheese before weighing it. That moment made my entire week. I felt important. Like I belonged in the world of grown-ups.

    After we paid and loaded everything into the car, Mommom would always open the bag of cold cuts on the ride home. The four of us would sit in the car, snacking and chatting, with the sun pouring through the windows. I remember the feel of the warm sun on my face and the salty taste of that slice of cheese. It was just an ordinary afternoon. But it was also so much more than that.

    That was a blackberry moment.

    It didn’t change the direction of my life. It didn’t announce itself as something profound. But it lingered. It settled into my bones the way only true sweetness can.

    Blackberry moments aren’t big. They aren’t dramatic. They don’t scream for your attention. They wait patiently inside the folds of your day, hoping you’ll pause long enough to notice them. They show up in the way your child’s hand fits in yours. In the way your dog greets you when you walk in the door. In the way a song makes you feel seen. Or the way your coffee tastes better when you have a minute to actually enjoy it.

    We miss so many of these moments because we are busy, distracted, or convinced that only the big stuff matters. But if there’s one thing I’ve learned from Ernie’s book, and from my own reflections, it’s this: the small things are the big things. The joy is already here. The softness, the beauty, the humanity — it’s all here, tucked inside the mundane.

    So as you go about your week, I hope you’ll keep your eyes open for your own blackberry moments. Don’t worry about chasing something extraordinary. Just be present enough to catch the ordinary while it’s happening.

    Thanks for taking this walk with me. I’ll be back again soon. But until then, take care of yourself. And keep your heart open to the sweet stuff.